At the Skeeter Corral
Crazy Kenny’s Closeout Corall
Via Daniel Hearn:
Merchandise was flying out the door this weekend at the Past Champions Iceboat Shop. A special invitation was needed from Crazy Kenny himself to gain access to the Closeout Coral, which is hidden behind a secret doorway cleverly disguised with hanging drop cloths. Once inside, new Michigan-based ice sailor, Tim Bellard remarked, “With all this red and white everywhere, I kept looking for the fat man in the velour suit. He never showed, but Christmas definitely came early.” Bellard took off with a 24 foot Sitka Spruce Skeeter wing mast that he purchased for a buddy who had an “unfortunate incident” last year. And Crazy Kenny even threw a sail into the deal and free delivery to the top of Tim’s trailer. Several other unsavory characters from the 4LIYC were around the shop witnessing the selling frenzy, but none was willing to publicly comment. “Maybe if we just stand here next to Kenny acting like nothing is going on, then no one will ask any questions,” suggested Sage PK. Due to their resounding silence, they must have all agreed.
Not to be outdone, Wonky Donny’s Discount Emporium across town was also dealing. He was all out of 10-speed bikes to entice Bellard to close a deal, but he was still able to send him out the door with a classic 4LIYC, red and white Renegade. Rumor has it that said Renegade was also loaded on the 12 ft. utility trailer, including mast and plank, directly adjacent to the Skeeter mast. Fearing that his insurance provider might yank his liability policy, Bellard requested that no pictures be taken of the impressively loaded vehicle. As yet, there have been no reports of flying ice boats on the east bound corridor of I-94, so all equipment must now be safely in their new home somewhere in the hand.
Back in the 80s, many 4LIYC Skeeter racers towed their rigs to the regattas in camper trucks. Some were M98, M96, M98, M161, M162, M1000, M150, M197, and many more. It was a rendezvous on ice! The wind was always moderate to heavy, and the ice was fast, clear, and deep. We enjoyed bacon and eggs at sunrise, and the flag was up at ten. Races were so plentiful there was a mandatory break for lunch and time to tune up your racer. I remember one time when Nelson M150 made lasagna for lunch. Her camper had an oven! Then we assembled back to our starting blocks after lunch at 1, followed by racing, tear-down, and smart-talk while sipping a few dippers at 4. Then the short walk to Norton’s for the Smoker and more smart-talk. As you see, I am making ready to experience those iceboat racing days again. See you all at the 2021 Western Challenge.
